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Going All Natural In a Toxic World

August 12, 2013 By Laura 9 Comments

Going All Natural In a Toxic World

 It’s been oh-so quiet here on the blog, for too many reasons.  Not excuses, mind you. Just reasons that quite obviously have taken priority lately. To briefly name them:

 The summer just hasn’t been a crafty season for me. I think I just want my studio done already, so I can be organized and inspired in my creative custom space! You have no idea how close it is.

 Of course, I’ve been very busy with the kids and their agendas. Most notably, getting Alexis Grace ready for her television commitment as co-host with Fr. Reed for World Youth Day 2013 in Rio providing live coverage of that massive event via satellite, at the CatholicTV station.  We stayed nearby the television station throughout the week for convenience, and it turned out to be a wonderful week all of us. Of course, the whole summer has been busy, in a fun and relaxed sort of way, as it should be with kids in the summer.

 Personally, I’ve also been investing my time in something I had a very sudden and very real urge to do, and that is to dig deep and learn more about and understand my faith, Catholicism,  to the core. So I have been studying so to speak, and am really learning even more than I knew there was to learn, and falling deeper in love with my faith, in the process.

But more than any of those things, I believe I haven’t been writing much for the blog here because I am have been all-consumed and so passionate about making some real changes in our lifestyle of living. To put it plainly;

I am on a heart-driven mission to detoxify my home and more importantly, my family as much as I possibly can.

And that, my Friends, has been a whole new education and very eye-opening experience. 

I’ve been fascinated and shocked by the amazing and encouraging differences I already see happening, with the changes I’ve made. Things I didn’t even know would be effected.  I imagine in time I’ll start sharing more specifically exactly what changes I’m making.

But today, I just want to kind of share the bigger picture with you, and focus more on why I’m making all of these changes.  I reckon some will think I am cRaZy, and that’s fine. Others may have no interest in this such overall health-related topics, and/or are the type that would just rather not know such truths. I can respect that, if that’s how you feel. The reality IS scary to think about, the changes do take effort, and it’s a personal decision. But from what I’m noticing locally and across the internet, many will be right there with me, so to speak.   Knowing exactly where I am coming from, and making many of those same changes themselves in their own families, if not all for the same reasons.

So to start, some may be wondering, “What toxins?”  Well I’m talking about the innumerable toxins that are in our everything. In our food, drink, personal care products, cleaning products, and even in our vitamins and medications! I have always known there were questionable ingredients in this and that. I haven’t been completely oblivious all along.  I’ve always been one to mostly shop the outskirts of the markets, avoid processed and pre-packaged foods, etc. I’ve known about certain very unhealthy ingredients that throw up a red flag for me, and have been wise enough to look for short lists on packages that list things of which I know exactly what they are.  But once I really started getting concerned about more and researching the matter, I have been horrified at what my family has been exposed to. Horrified.  And freakin’ mad, frankly!!  I had to wonder how and why these thing are even acceptable to be sold, when we are ingesting them or absorbing them into our bodies?

One would think….the FDA or someone, would not allow harmful ingredients (such as known carcinogens: Definition: car·cin·o·gen -/kärˈsinəjən/; noun;any substance or agent that tends to produce a cancer.) to be put in many of the items we buy in stores every day, right?  Oh-yes-they do.
*Did you know, that there are many ingredients in our every day food, that is banned in other countries, because of the harmful health risks of them?*
  But the United States, God bless our country, is a whole different ball game.  And while it’s a whole different rant-post, the things many don’t know about and should, are a big ugly circle of those we depend on most for our healthcare, and it all comes down to money, and making as much as they can. At OUR expense, of not only our money, but our health, and in many instances, the ultimate price of our life.  It’s hard to stop there for now, but I will.

 But I will share more personally today, the basic reasons I am so determined to spend so much time researching, educating myself, experimenting, and discovering a whole new way of living for my family: from what we eat and how we prepare that food, to personal care from head-to-toe, to what we use to clean our home. 

The Why’s

1)  One very important reason is for the health of my family.
Not only how we feel day to day on a basic level, but doing what I can to prevent the onset of major health issues, most especially (and prominently), cancer, of course. You may have noticed it’s more prevalent than ever. And there are reasons for that, that are infuriating but somewhat possibly avoidable if you’re proactive enough. Now I’ll be the first to tell anyone, my husband is not as gung-ho about the wealth of changes I’m making. Nor does he mind them. He pretty much just follows suit, and doesn’t carry the health concerns I do for us or the kids.  And mind you, he and I are already in our mid-40’s, and have already been exposed to the same number of years of toxins. I grew up in a 2-smoker home, and I know he grew up around it as well. Still, while the damage and outcome for us may be a done-deal so to speak, there still is the chance of fending it off, and as they say, it’s never too late to make good changes. There is also the chance of healing. Throw God’s grace in there, if it is His will, and we still have a fighting chance of living a full life, and dying a natural death of plain-old old age. If nothing else, we are setting a good example for the children. Which brings me to, the children. 🙂 They have their whole lives ahead of them, God-willing, and I want to do all I can to keep them as healthy, happy, and toxic-free as I possibly can, for as long as I can.  And again, keeping toxins out of our system has got to just make us feel and operate better on a day to day basis, just as being polluted has got to effect our energy level, sense of well-being, alertness, etc., as well.
So, our health is certainly a very big factor in the reasons why I am making big changes around here.

2) Secondly, and probably more importantly to me, another reason I am feeling so passionate and convicted to go so much more natural in every aspect of our life, is to honor God and all of His Creation.

 

I truly believe, with all of my heart, that in the whole of His Creation, God gave us every single thing we need to not only survive, but be well.

I want to more naturally follow God’s plan He provided us with, wherever we can, by using as many of the natural resources He alone gifted us with in the way of animals, plants, vitamins, minerals, etc.  For us, that means food, as well as medicine. (More on that in a bit.). 

3) Thirdly, as I said, the changes are not so much for us adults’ sake, but God-willing, this amped-up perspective my kid’s are growing up with, will truly become their own, and they will embrace these habits, by their own free-will, in their own independent way of living.  Because it’s not only a healthier way of living, but it’s God-honoring. And while we are far from perfect and fail often, we are all about trying to be as God-honoring as possible, in our family.

So, What Am I Changing In Our Day-to-Day Lives?

Well first let me state that the changes I’m making are happening little by little, and are not yet complete.  As of the typing of this post, I have not made all of the transitions as of yet, that I am going to be. The reasons are several:  Whether I am still researching/learning the ingredients I’ll need, I’m still experimenting and figuring out how I want to try things first, or not ready to spend money on this or that quite yet until I am sure what I’m doing. (As to not be wasteful.).  You’ll understand more as you read on.

Food and Drink – As I said above, I’ve always been particular about what we eat, and even more particular about what goes into my kids.  I’m conscientious of (not) buying processed foods, avoid things loaded with all kinds of sugars, bad fats, artificial colors, chemicals, long lists of unknowns, etc. It’s a rare of occasion we ever have anything that would be considered junk in our house. We’ve never had soda in the house. (Except very recently, for that splash on top of my sangrias. ; ).  And I’ve been getting the most important produce to be organic (click to learn exactly what organic means), whenever possible. That can be more of a challenge than you’d think. We are blessed to have some amazing farmer’s markets around here, and when in season, the kids and I frequent one almost every week. We love to stroll around them, meet local growers, buy fresh, local and safe produce, and enjoy the music. Still, even what is available at the local farmer’s markets are not in any way guaranteed to be organic, or chemical/insecticide-free. So I ask lot of questions, before purchasing, to be sure they meet my own safety and high quality standards.  I get free-range organic eggs; locally when available. So, we’ve been doing respectably well.

STILL, I have a whole lot to still learn and understand, and there are many changes left to be made.  Probably, the more I learn, the more I’ll want to change.  I’d like to increase our organic take-home ratio, and that would include 100% grass fed beef.  The pink-squirm-filler news was enough to turn anyone off. Certainly me. And it was another instance that left me feeling ‘duped’ by the food industry, again. Now, organic beef really is more expensive, but we don’t eat it very regularly anyway, and the benefits as opposed to the risks are worth it.  We eat a lot of chicken, so we’ve been more careful about which kind we buy of that for sure, already. 

As I said, I am learning as I go.  I can tell you in the process so far, I have learned enough to be upset enough to make certain changes for sure. And yet, some of it is all too out of our control, due to non-obligations by manufacturers etc., to label foods as they should be. We do have a right to know, and that’s a fight all it’s own. But in a nutshell, my concerns and changes regarding food revolve around chemicals/insecticides, GMO’s (Genetically Modified Organisms), the upset with company Monsanto, and the long list of acceptable ingredients in our food that are ok’d by the FDA, and yet banned in other countries due to knowing the harm it does to health.  I’m sure I’ll go more in depth about those things, the more ‘aware’ I become, in other blog posts.

Are you afraid I’m going to turn into one of those loud, pro-active, country-travelin’, sign-holding, lunatic-advocates creating and spreading awareness all over the place?
Well I must say, me too. 😉

Natural Medicine – Now I don’t plan on banning our doctors, or necessarily absolutely forbidding physician provided prescriptions, because there is sometimes a necessity and place for scientific intervention. (A prime example would be Shane’s life-saving Epi-Pens. Should we ever need them, I can guarantee you I will use them!) But as a general rule, we have already been naturally treating a whole host of things, using more natural home remedies, before we turn to any kind of over the counter medications. I can’t recall if I was a new bride, or still dating Michael, but it was my mother-in-law (possibly to-be) who first got me pondering home remedies. She had a book on the shelf, and was often suggesting what sounded to me like the craziest things, for whatever the minor ailments. Now, I’ve completely embraced safer, more natural remedies to ‘cure’ this or that.  And I love it all now.  It probably has something to do with having children, and loving them far more than self, and wanting what’s best for them.

And in a big way, I have been getting very familiar with 100% pure therapeutic grade essential oils.
OH MY GOSH, how these have changed our life! Like, don’t even get me started.  Talk about natural remedies; there is little that these essential oils cannot help with.  While we can’t claim they cure or heal you, (legally, lol), even if they can, they certainly have very powerful medicinal properties, and allow your body, to heal itself. And in my world, with the grace of God I am sure, too, there is no doubt He is pleased for anyone to utilize the oils of plants………..as He intended for us to.  That’s in part why God made all the various plants, flowers and trees of this world. Most all of medications, be them over the counter or prescribed, are made of synthetic components, completely man-made, in an effort to replicate the powerful natural compounds found in nature, that are scientifically proven to have vast benefits and very strong medicinal properties. And, even more bothersome; all too many prescription medications help one thing, while causing another health problem to deal with. Also known as risks and side-effects. In other words, they do harm on the flip-side. I just truly believe we are meant to use God’s Creation as the sacred basis of treatment for ourselves, for anything.  Everyone may not agree that, but I do, and I’m going with it.

 

There are many, many essential oils that, when used as 100% therapeutic grades, and used properly, have very powerful, effective, medicinal, healing properties.  Not only to treat both major and minor physical conditions, but relieve pain, enable mood management, enhance mental focus, and so (SO!) much more.  I have been able to get off of a medication I thought I would need to take for the rest of my life!  Our whole family is using these essential oils now, and I can attest to the fact that they have truly enhanced the quality of our life, not only physically speaking, but the environment of our sacred place – our home.

I know this: When my kids are asking for them, I especially know it’s not a matter of me losing my mind, or just wanting to believe they work.  They can feel the difference too, and they want that kind of quality in every one of their days, too.  I feel my whole family has been seriously blessed, to have gained the valuable  knowledge I have about the power of essential oils. I can’t learn enough about them, and that’s great, because there is a lot to learn!  The more I learn, the more I feel empowered, to keep my family healthy and happy.

And we now realize there is a whole world of natural resources as remedies to restore every day health and wellness, for the whole body.

Personal Care Products –  Again, I’ve been so disturbed by learning about some of the ingredients that are in the products we use in our personal care every day. Ingredients that have no business going in our mouths, or slathered all over our bodies.  I’m talking TOXINS, that absolutely effect our health, and put us at great risk for diseases.  Not only will many suffer eventual health issues as result of them, but I believe no doubt, again, that they effect how we physically feel on a day to day basis.  I’m putting my foot down about it, in my family.  I am learning to make most everything I possibly can for my family, with safe, all-natural, toxin-free ingredients.  I don’t need any personal care product we use in this family to be pretty. I just need it to be safe, and effective. This is very much a work in progress, and there are many toxic-products we are still using as I type this post today. But one by one, they will be replaced.  And soon.
It’s actually been fun and interesting researching and experimenting different ways to make different things.  And this is another area essential oils have been a blessing.


In Conclusion

All in all, my goal is to establish a home for my family that is nourishing in every way, from what we consume, to what we clean ourselves and our home with.  It will bring me great peace, and I pray will be all-God-honoring, to live off of not what is manufactured, but with what is not only home-made, but GOD-made. 

I hope you’ll continue to follow us, and see the various ways I go about accomplishing that.  And as I know many are on the same path as I am, I welcome your suggestions, links, experiences and thoughts along the way!  It’s always a joy to learn from and encourage each other!  I’m looking forward to lots of it, with you.
~ Laura

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Filed Under: Faith, Into the Light; The Series, Life In General, Parenting, The Big Picture Tagged With: all-natural-living, Catholic TV, disease-prevention, essential-oils, Faith, family-health, farmers-markets, Gods-Creation, Gods-resources, health, health-treatment, home-remedies, homemade-remedies, homeopathic remedies, natural-remedies, organic, organic-produce, toxic-ingredients, toxins-in-food, toxins-in-personal-care-products, World-Youth-Day-2013

Christmas Eve / Morning – 2012

December 29, 2012 By Laura 4 Comments

With Christmas 2012 behind us, we ultimately decided to blog a little bit of it, before we move on to wrapping up our year of projects for you, revealing a new one, and jumping into the new year with both feet, and some bigger projects than ever, that you are welcome to follow along with us. I cannot wait to get to all of that, and hopefully you all might have some great ideas and help for us along the way. It’s going to be too much fun!

But first, our little Christmas. We try to keep the entire season quite simple and stress-free.  (Not always an easy thing to do – right?). We celebrate Advent, we decorate, make some handmade gifts and shop a little, bake, drive around neighborhoods at night with cocoa to see people’s Christmas lights, and stuff like that.  We also try to not get too distracted from remembering that Jesus’ birth, and what the course of His earthly life would mean for us all, is the whole purpose of our own celebrations, personally. Some years Christmas Eve and Day is more simple than others, with a little more or less gifts or family/friends around.

This year we went to Christmas Eve Mass, and had a quiet evening at home, with a little festive food spread.  While we had bought the kids a few gifts, Michael and I decided not to put them out the night before.  First because, one, two, or all of them tend to get up during the night to use the bathroom or get a drink of water, and I really didn’t want them to see anything.  Secondly, I was kind of curious what their reaction would be. There have been Christmas’ where the only gifts they received were from extended family and friends. But this year, since this year has progressively gone quite well, and we could afford more, I actually asked them all what they might want for Christmas. That’s something I’ve never actually done. Their requests were easy enough: certain books (Olivia and the Trio), a new basketball (Shane), a Pillow Pet (JackMichael), socks, (socks?), and Patriots or Tim Tebow calendar (Alexis).  So we got them those things, and a few more surprises.  But when they got up in the morning, there was nothing more under the tree than there had been all week: packages that had arrived for them from other family, and a large gift bag each from a sweet family friend. Still, they were bouncing around the house all happy-chatty and excited because well . . . it was Christmas Day.  And they love Christmas.

(After Mass on Christmas Eve.)

But Michael and I were pretty excited, to give them their gifts! So after breakfast and an hour or so of chilling in our pajamas, we asked the kids to go upstairs for a few minutes, until we called them.  After the 4 “Why?” ‘s, and our refusal to answer, they went up, and we got everything around the tree.  Despite the fact that there is a lot more to our simple Christmas than presents, that happens to be all I took photos of this year! lol.  Since I do intend to get back to some major scrapbooking some day, and I take photos of the kids through their childhood for their/our own memories, I always ponder if I should bother blogging these kinds of things. But our oldest (Alexis) and husband say yes – it’s our family blog in the end, and they want these memories a part of it too. Not just all of our projects and things we do. So I put together a small collection of some of my favorite photos of them opening their gifts. Note: I am TERRIBLE with on camera flash. Ugh-hate using it.  But the important thing for our family history is having these (any) family photos someday – perfect or not, they will be treasured more and more as time goes on. So I am embracing candid casual photography, to most enjoy these times with my family. There is a little description with each photo. But I’ll also say that aside from what they are sitting in, and a small gift each from us, they also got a few small things together, and one bigger item (which has not yet arrived), and will be part of another post (a major room revamp), coming soon.

If you look through the slideshow, you can use the arrows to go to the next one. Anytime you want to get out of the slideshow mode, simply click ON the photo, and it will close out.

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However you and your family does Christmas, we hope it was beautiful, meaningful, peaceful, and you were surrounded by love and happiness.

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Filed Under: Celebrations, Faith, Faith/ Catholic, Holidays, The Big Picture, Traditions Tagged With: Catholic-blogs, Catholic-families, Christmas

“I Am Third” | A Wood Pallet Sign

December 5, 2012 By Laura 9 Comments

It’s always a great day, when I finally get something OUT of my head, and am able to find the time to bring it to life, and have it real and in front of me.  It makes me happy because, there’s a whole lot in my head, that never (ever) gets out!  I wish I could do all of the projects that I actually think of, but I have other joyful obligations too, than just being all artsy 24/7.  So only a small percentage of my notions ever actually come to be.
I’m really glad this one did though, because it’s a meaningful one in our home.

The vision was a wood pallet sign.  And we usually have no shortage of those, as this is what our driveway often looks like . . . . . .

. . . . and there’s more where those came from.  Michael is able to get them from work by the load anytime.  Many of them he chops up and we burn in our wood stove. Free wood is always good!  But they are great for many other things too.  And a pallet was perfect for my idea for the sign I wanted to make.

The theme of the sign is a phrase we are fond of in our family, and try to live by, and it is this:

 
I am third.

You may well guess all on your own.
Like all families with many kids, one of my tasks as a parent is to teach my children to always put God first, be compassionate of others, and make great efforts to be selfless whenever possible.  Having triplets, you can imagine we’ve had many teachable moments and conversations about this kind of thing from toddler-hood on up, while encouraging them to share, and not grow with any kind of mindset that our own wants and needs should always or ever be first. That’s just not how we roll, as Christians.  Of course, this philosophy of serving, goes far beyond the constraints of our family, and the walls of our home. It applies to our world and every day we live in it, and with all whom we interact with across the board, from absolute strangers, to acquaintances, to loved ones a part of our personal lives, and everyone in between whom we happen upon daily .  I want that to stick with my kids, as they grow older in their faith, and take on this world, with all of their plans and dreams before them. It can only help, for each one of us to be reminded often.


And so with another an extra piece of plywood, some old extra nails we had on hand, and some paint and a brush, the pallet sign I saw in my head for so long, was created:


Because of the list form of my idea, I saw the pallet as the perfect material for the sign.
It was cut down to a size of about 20″ x 27″.


I wanted it kept as simple as possible. Rustic, raw, and straightforward. Sure, it may not always be easy to live the message.
But God always forgives us, and we always have the opportunity to keep on trying.
It is a simple concept to remember, in terms of the priorities we want to strive to serve in our life:
God
Others
Self

For some reason, I always saw it in this darker red.  When it came time to paint, I stopped and considered other colors.
But I really needed to create it just as I had envisioned it for so long. Or else I could go crazy.

Michael hung it up the very same day. Right there where we all see it, again and again, every day.  He loves it as much as I do.
I suppose others may come into our home, start to read it, and be a little perplexed.  But one of the most cherished things about having a home to me, is making it a place that is meaningful to our family. It’s the little things, that are personal and of the heart, that make it feel like home.  And this sign….. and all it says….it means something to us.  It’s an awareness that we want to be reminded of, again and again. Not just the kids. But all of us. I know I can use such a gentle reminder, as often as anyone else.

There is lots more space on this particular wall in our open living space, up there with the clock. The wall is much bigger than it even appears in this photo, with the cathedral ceiling.  We realize the sign is so flush left, and leaves the wall as a whole quite unbalanced. But we’re ok with that for now.  Soon enough, the wall all around the clock will be filled with other things that mean something to us. Maybe more signs.  Who knows. But we have no desire to rush these things, just to fill up and balance the wall. It’s what is hanging there, that matters to us.
All of the space? Well, that’s what I call inspiration. Like a blank sheet of lined paper, or a canvas.  The possibilities are endless, and exciting.

The kids have really embraced the lesson, most days. But when they are together and it’s needed, because one, or some, or all are reverting back to looking out for themselves over little things,  I like to remind them:
“If everyone put everyone else second, you’ll always actually be second, too! Not third. Right? So just be a good example.”  ; )
I’m a tricky Mama. ; )


I wonder what I’ll be able to get out of my head, next.

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Filed Under: Crafts & Creations, DIY (Do-It-Yourself) Project, Faith, Faith/ Catholic, Home Decor, Into the Light; The Series, Life In General, Parenting, Re-Purposing, The Big Picture, The Homestead Tagged With: Christianity, Faith, God-first, home decor, pallet-ideas, pallet-projects, Parenting, rustic-signs, signs, wall-signs, wood-pallet-signs

The Loss of Our Hedgehog | Children Learning About Life, Loss and Sadness.

November 20, 2012 By Laura 15 Comments

If you follow us on Facebook or Twitter, you may already know we lost our only pet recently.
Pixel was Alexis’ hedgehog, really. She’s the one that researched hedgehogs and pleaded for one for a year, paid for her (not cheap!), and took care of her the most.  Still, we all loved Pixel right off the bat. Most surprisingly, was me.  I especially don’t like dogs and cats. There are people in our lives I really don’t want to know that, because I don’t want to hurt their feelings. But I never knew, or wondered, what I would think of a quilled little creature, until Pixel came along . . . . . .

I surprised myself the day she came home as a little baby, and I kind of fell for her.  She really was the sweetest little thing. Just a quilled little handful of love.
And she never grew too much bigger than that. In the next couple of years, Alexis and Pixel were practically inseparable.

Many school days, Pixel was with Alexis while she did her school work.


She got lots of love and attention, in between subjects.
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We were always trying to get her to eat fruits or vegetables. We thought she’d feel privileged this one day, with the first strawberries pick of the season from our garden, but she declined.
And not politely, but with a HUFF.

The kids loved to play with her, giving her rides and such. . . . . .
. . . . .and Pixel loved to find places to hide. She was always looking for somewhere to curl up into a ball, and go to sleep.
It was hilarious when she went under the truck, but couldn’t back up to get out, because of her quills.

She even became somewhat of a little star.


Alexis had created a comic strip series around her, called Catholic Hedgehog, and some of the strips were shared on the Catholic TV forum a few times.

She occasionally went places with us, since she was pocket-sized, and potty-trained too!
Once, she even we went down to the Plymouth Waterfront with us.  People were so intrigued with her.
“What is it? A porcupine?”

She’s been a part of our life,  So we were all getting concerned when she seemed to be having some health problems a few months back. Alexis made an appointment for her (her first ever!) with Firehouse Veterinary Clinic who somewhat specialized in exotic animals, and although it took a few weeks on a medication, Pixel seemed to get better.  But then she wasn’t again. She was not eating much, and she had lost a lot of weight. Alexis was really upset about it, not knowing what was wrong or how to help her get better for good, and so was the trio.  She went back to the vet again, and after an examination, and Pixel not even huffing through it all, the vet said there was nothing he really could do to help her.  Alexis was crushed. He did offer to put her to sleep, but Alexis declined, since we had every intention of voting NO on Question 2. (Physician Assisted Suicide).  So the vet gave Alexis some sugar water, and some special wet food, to try and give her at home.

Surprisingly, Alexis did get Pixel eating pretty well, although she was hand-feeding her with a syringe. But she seemed to be doing better for a few days, and we all had hope Pixel would recover.  We were happy to report that, when the vet’s called to check on how Pixel was doing. But only a few days later, she went downhill again.  Alexis was distraught that day, and felt so helpless. She set Pixel up beside her bed that night, and got up all night giving her a drink of water with the syringe and comforting her, because Pixel seemed too weak to even be able get up and stand anymore.  She had stopped eating altogether.

  The next morning, it was a school day, but none of us cared.  The kids were gathered around Pixel, and they were all so quiet. Pixel was lying on her pretty flowered fleece blanket on the table, just blinking.  The kids knew it wasn’t looking good for. She was not doing well at all. Definitely worse than the night before.  Her breathing was labored, and she hardly moved.  I couldn’t help but watching the 4 of them, with their quiet moods, and compassionate expressions on their faces, as they spoke quietly to her, and stroked her quills softly, in the morning sunlight that came through the windows onto the table.  These were the tough lessons in life, we all need to learn how to face.  As much as I wish I could forever protect my children from any sadness and heartaches that life brings, I can’t.  I knew, while this was so difficult for them, these moments were preparing them for much harder losses in their life to come.
And as they held her tiny paw, she took her last breathe.

Alexis scooped her up and just sobbed.  The trio were all quietly crying too. I think maybe, they hurt more for seeing Alexis hurt so much, than they did for the loss of Pixel.
So did I.


We all said goodbye to her, and Alexis wrapped her in her prettiest fleece blanket.
.

When Michael (Daddy) came home, he built a small casket for her.
Alexis used her wood-burner to engrave it with her name and dates.
And still wrapped in her blanket, she laid her inside. Michael nailed it closed.
And Alexis cried more tears.

That night I didn’t sleep well. As I lied in bed thinking about the rough day we had had, I knew we had done many things right in preparing our kids for things like this. Sickness. Death. The loss of a loved one.  In my own life experiences, I never went to a wake until I was in high school. My siblings and I had been to many funerals of neighbors or relatives, but never to a wake.  It was my uncle’s, and it was a loss I felt the most sad about up until that point in my life, than any I had had before. So I had wished I had been to wakes, before his.

But the very first real loss I had of someone in my life, who I loved a lot, was my mother. I had never really lost someone close to me before. I had never even known grief, until I lost her. What a way to break me in. It hit me like a train. I was not prepared for the emotional toll it took on me. At all.  The grief was deep for months. And I was in my mid 30’s.  But I felt like a child, in my difficulty coming to terms with the loss, like a child. Maybe because I was the child. So I have wanted to do all l I can to prepare my kids for losing those they love, and helping them learn how to deal with those feelings, talk about it, and find the comforts that help them cope.  Alexis, the oldest, has already lost 2 grandparents she loved dearly. She had established a relationship with them, loved them, and had many memories of both of them. So she has felt the loss of them in her heart. The trio were too young to remember a whole lot of either of their grandparents they lost. Some memories, but not years of them. So it’s been easier for them. Still, they have lost others they have known since, and for all they have attended their wakes, and their funerals if possible. With lots of conversations before and after, of course, and they have handled it all very well.

So it is with the loss of Pixel. Sure, she was just a pet. But I think it is important for them to go through the process, because they, especially Alexis, was so sad to to lose her.  While no one ever gets used to losses, or gets good at all of the feelings that come with it, I do think it is important for children to become slowly familiar with it all, and not shelter them from the realities of it.  I feel it’s right for my children anyway, and Michael agrees. Death, the loss, and grief, are all a part of God’s greater plan for every life.  But it’s real and it’s necessary to face these things with the smaller losses, or those people they haven’t known very well or were very close to. Because the sadness is still there. Not just our own, but other’s. I’ve been grateful to be able to be there for my children and help them through it, as we’ve lost ones we love in our life together so far.

Knowing we did need to go through the rest of the process for Pixel, and still lying in bed pondering through the night hours, I wondered where we could bury her in the yard.  It took a bit of thinking, because probably next year or so, every part of our yard, both upper and lower, will be completely dug up and rearranged. So I was trying to think of somewhere that would definitely not be getting disturbed. That’s when I thought of in the railroad-tie planter walls behind the house. It was perfect.

The next morning, Michael dug Pixel’s grave, to bury her.


With the trio by her side, Alexis put her beloved hedgehog in the ground.
.


I gave Alexis a stone cross I had had, to use as Pixel’s grave marker, which I thought was so appropriate and feminine.  Pixel was a girl, after all.
But surprisingly, her father also gave her permission to burn her name into the railroad-tie wall.   I was surprised he let her do that.  But she really wanted to, and again, I feel like these are the things that help one cope with the loss, and give us closure.  Even the burning itself, on the little casket, and letter by letter, into the wall.
.

It was all harder than I ever imagined experiencing, over a pet.  I mean, we had lost a couple beta fish before, Bubbles and then Reagan -the red Republican fish.
Then there was William, the royal turtle.  They managed those losses quite fine.
But Pixel, the Catholic Hedgehog, was just different, for my kids.
What was hardest for me, was watching my girl have such a hard time.
She was so sad.


She was breaking my heart.  But I was glad to be there whenever she needs me, to help comfort her through it all.  And I was really proud with all she did to take care of Pixel, all by herself.
She had handled the vet appointments all by herself and everything. From the calls for appointments, to the actual exam and discussion with the doctor, in there all by herself. Because she wanted to. She took care of Pixel right to the end, and laid her to rest with her own hands too.


I really couldn’t hug her enough.
And every time I did, I knew it was just what she needed.


It really is the perfect spot.
.

And we all kind of smile now, when we look out the window, and remember Pixel.
She really was a quilled little handful of love.
And she taught our kids so much; About responsibility, and love.
And letting go.
While we hold on to the memories that make us smile, and our hearts grow happy again.

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Filed Under: Faith, Faith/ Catholic, Life In General, Parenting, The Big Picture Tagged With: Catholic-blogs, Catholic-families, children-and-loss-of-pets, hedgehog-photos, hedgehogs, kids-learning-to-cope-with-loss, loss-of-pets, pets, teaching-kids-about-loss

On Faith, Gardening, and Digging Deep.

May 2, 2012 By Laura 9 Comments

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      Our family really loves Sundays.  It’s just a feel-good-family day, all the way around.

     This past Sunday after Mass, we all came home, and changed into our old clothes, so that we could get working in our garden beds.  Oh, the butterflies I get this time of year! It’s almost time for planting, so we needed to get all of the winter rye that we had growing in the beds, chopped down, and turned into the soil. There is much to do, to create soil rich enough to produce well for us.

cultivating-faith-gardening      Whenever I’m working in the gardens, especially in the planting season, my thoughts most always turn to my faith in God. In my mind, there are many parallels, between the process of gardening, and one’s day to day faith.

 

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The Dirt on Gardening

     With gardening, we put so much into all we hope for.  We cultivate the soil, nourish it, and plant our tiny seeds or little starters, where they will receive the proper amount of light.  We water them daily, if nature does not send us sufficient rain. We wait and keep watch daily, with great anticipation.  Our eyes seek for a sprout. Some sign of growth. For the fruits of our labor, to reveal itself.  Although we may enjoy all we put into our gardens along the way, the reward is the great surplus each plant provides for us, whether it be beauty or food, from the little seed we began with.

Cultivating Our Hearts

     Isn’t that much like how our faith begins? At some point in our lives, a seed of faith in God, was planted within many of us. Whether we were aware of that exact moment happening, or not. For many of us, that may have been as babies, and nourished throughout our upbringing, from our parents. For others, it may have come much later in life. Perhaps it began with circumstances in life, or one’s own seeking for something they felt was missing. But for all of us, our spirituality can only grow and bloom, when we have given our time to cultivate that most important relationship in our lives.  When we have turned to Him, in times of thanksgiving and praise, and in times of need and despair, as well. When we have spent time daily, in communion with our Savior, Jesus Christ – in thought, in prayer, in praise, in a way that keeps our heart open to Him.

 

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To Know God, is to Better Revel in Life

Our faith in God, and our relationship with Christ, we believe is what enables us to experience a more elevated state of joy in our days here on earth. Our eyes are open to the abundant blessings that rains down on us, and all around us. We know that all good things come to us, by the grace of His loving hand.  Our hearts rejoice, for the love He shows us.  Likewise, we have learned, we are wise to give thanksgiving, even for the most difficult trials and tribulations in our lives.  Even they have great purpose, and bring forth blessings of their own. It is easy to question God, isn’t it? We want to know why, for each one of our sufferings. But we know deep down inside, God’s love for us is pure, and beyond measure. He is there to comfort us, He does only want what is best for us, and only He knows the big picture of ours lives.

    God is good. God is always good!

 

Even on the Darkest of Days

     Oh, we know friends, the devastation life can bring.  Unexpected tragedies, life-threatening or terminal illnesses, lost lives of people we love, unemployment and financial hardships, betrayals and broken hearts….the list is endless.  We know….it is touching the lives of people we know and love, all around us, too. Our family too, is not untouched by the hardships and disappointments of our own, that can roll in like the tide, leaving a mess on our seashore of life, that was so clean and beautiful yesterday.  The memory of what was, leaves us longing, and we wonder if we appreciated it enough, while we had it. We wonder when the tide will ever come in again, to sweep the mess away.  

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Inclement Elements

           Despite the time and attention we have invested in our gardens, or our daily spirituality, there is always the threat of damaging elements, that can come along on any given day, to deal with for a time. In both the daily lives we live, as well as the weather, there are storms.  They must be faced with courage. We must persevere.  We must stand on the greatest asset we have, which is our faith, in the most difficult of times, and believe that God will help bring us through our trials, to the other side of the storm.

     His love for us is filled with many promises, that are grace….

Sticky Note This

    It is easy to forget, for we get wrapped up in this physical life. But we would be wise to remember, and take comfort in knowing, that ultimately, we are not meant for this world.  The greatest gifts of all, a life free of any and suffering, are promised to us eternally, beyond our earthly days.

     It is the mustard seed of faith, from within our hearts, that we know as truth, that always offers the light of hope.

     “The Light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it” – John 1:5

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Pass It On, to the Littles

    By our side, our children learn about the complexities of life.  From the day they are born, they experience all of the happiness, wonders, and beautiful gifts of life, as well as the realization that the world is not a perfect place, and that bad and sad things can happen, even to good people. And the value of our faith, through it all!   

     Parenting is our beautiful opportunity, to build up in them character to live a life pleasing to God! Thankfully, as homeschoolers, we have that ability to navigate when and how our children awake to the challenges of life, and realities of this world. I can tell you that there are many raw, honest, and deep discussions that take place, with our children. It’s a beautiful time of connection, between us all. But as a parent, to see the revelations unfold within them, is such a heart-wrenching honor.  We cannot shield them from all of the hurts and truths that life can bring. Doesn’t a piece of every parent’s heart, want to? But no, it would be a great dis-service to them, to keep them ignorant to the harsh realities of life, for long. 

     What we can do, is arm them well, with the tools of our never-failing faith, and a strong faith in our God, who never leaves us.

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Expect a Mixed Forecast
, But Take Heart

         Life can bring the greatest moments of laughter and happiness.  We cannot count the ways in which we have been blessed!  Our days can be filled with such sunshine, contentment and peace. But when the dark storms of life circumstances descend upon us, our faith can feel diminished, to the size of a mustard seed. It can be very difficult to find solace in our faith, so small and buried.

     But those are the times we need our faith, more than ever!  If we have allowed ourselves to be filled with bitterness and anger, it can be difficult to bring ourselves to reach. To be humble enough, to express such a need, in the face of feeling abandoned. We must find the seed though, that we alone have neglected, shriveling again in the questioning of God’s love for us. Maybe we turn away from God in anger, confused, but He never leaves us alone. We must get back to the seed of our faith, and begin again. Because it holds all of the promises, and all of the strength from the graces of receiving the Sacraments, that we need to carry us through.  So that peace and contentment can be ours again. In time, if we turn our face upwards to Him again, and open our hearts, we will see He was always at work within us, through the storm.  God heals hearts.  Let Him!

“You will grieve, but your grief will turn into joy.” John 16:20

 

Light Into Darkness, and Back Again

     Maybe that is part of His plan all along…..to bring us to the point where we realize, we actually need Him. To make us seek His grace.  He wants us to know the comfort of His love.  He wants to help us see His face…..the Light, in the darkness.  To truly know Him and need Him, so that we always walk beside Him, and realize that He only wants to lead us to something greater.  Don’t we always appreciate the light shining on all that is beautiful, the most after we have experienced such darkness? 

   Are you experiencing darkness, in this period of your life?  Are you resistant, or wrestling, to sense the great faith you had on better days?

   Your hope and solace, is in the mustard seed, friend.  Sometimes, when we have neglected all we have built up in faith, we must begin again. In doing so, God promises our gardens can not only flourish again, but bring forth more fruit than we ever dreamed for ourselves.  His love for us, is that great. That is what He wants for us, and what we truly want, for ourselves.

So we must. dig. deeper.



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Filed Under: Faith, Faith/ Catholic, Gardening, Into the Light; The Series, Life In General, The Big Picture, The Homestead Tagged With: Catholic-blogs, Catholic-families, encouragement, Faith, faith-encouragement-in-hard-times, faith-in-troubled-times, gardening-like-faith, grieving, life-is-hard, mustard-seed-of-faith

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